Why Boys Need Male Mentors

Do boys need male mentors? For me, that is no different than asking if flowers need water. The answer to that question becomes obvious if you have ever seen a flower without water. The answer to the original question would also become obvious once you have observed what happens to a generation of boys without the influences of men in their lives.

The answer is yes. Boys need male mentors. In today's culture there are many homes in which the Father may be absent. In those cases it is still necessary for the boys in that home to be exposed to the mentoring influences of men. Single mothers must take great care to see to it that her boys are under as many good male influences as possible. There are many places these mentors can be found.

• Extended family members
• Local Boy Scout Troop
• Men in a local Church congregation
• Etc.

This mentoring is vitally important in the life of boys, especially in their formative years. However, it is helpful if the boys can have mentors through their teen years, and right on up into young adulthood. Please consider the following benefits to male mentoring.

• A Mentor will provide identity. Often young boys without the benefit of male mentors will begin to behave in the more feminine way of the women in his life. This is not to demean the women's efforts, but young boys need men to help mold their identities.


• A Mentor will provide guidance. As his body begins to change, young boys need a trusted mentor to be able to help them through the feelings of insecurity they will experience. As their bodies grow, acne developes, voices crack, and hormones begin to flow, having mentor will answer a number of questions a boy will have, but will be embarrassed to ask his mother.


• A Mentor will provide leadership. Young boys will begin to assert their leadership qualities early on in life. Without the firm hand of an older male mentor, they may become quite difficult to handle. A good mentor can channel the boys desire to take the lead and teach him the proper way to express those desires.


• A Mentor will provide approval. Young boys desperately need approval. The rarely need codling. A mentor (preferably a father) will provide the approval the boys naturally crave, while holding the standard high. You would be amazed how a boys behaviour will change when there is a man in his life who has high expectations of him. The boy will do most anything to seek his approval. This is why so many young men without a male mentor join gangs or are attracted to other wrong influences. They need male approval, and if they are not getting it from a good source, they will get it somewhere else.

Of course a mentor is not always available. If you are entrusted with the rearing of young boys, without the benefit of a male mentor, then you must do the best you can. Certainly it is not a guarantee that you will fail. However, I urge you to seek out a male mentor for you boys if at all possible. You will never regret doing so!