Bullying is at epidemic proportions in our community. Our headlines are filled with stories about young people who commit suicide from being bullied. There are different types of bullying. In this article I will give a brief explanation of cyber-bullying and provide signs to look for.
What is Cyber-Bullying? Since the internet and mobile web we have become a part of our lives, bullies have brought bullying into these areas as well. Commonly called "cyber-bullying," bullying by electronic communication is a serious, yet often dismissed problem. However, statistics show that in fact, it may be worse than traditional bullying.
Suicide: Over 14% of high school students have considered suicide, and almost 7% have attempted it. Girls between the ages of 10-14 years old may be at even greater risk of suicide. That risk goes up exponentially when the victim is taunted over sexual orientation: gay, lesbian, and transgender students are far more likely to be bullied into a suicide attempt. Suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death among young people, resulting in about 4,400 deaths per year.
Parents and caregivers can only actively prevent suicide attempts if they know that their child is in emotional turmoil. Below are several signs to look for.
• A sudden change in behavior or temperament. There may be any number of things that could cause an otherwise healthy child to "turn on a dime" and become like someone else. Changes can be a warning sign of youthful thoughts of suicide, despondence, or drug addiction. Regardless of the reason, sudden alterations in the child's sense of self should be noted and examined.
• An unexplained preoccupation with death. It is perfectly normal for children to be fascinated by death after their first real experience with it, be it the loss of a grandparent, the family pet, a classmate, etc. However, an unhealthy preoccupation with morbid interests may point to a darker motive than mere curiosity. Understanding why your child holds these interests is an important step in assessing his or her emotional health.
• Preparing "final arrangements" for their pets or belongings. If a child you know is writing out a will or suddenly giving away cherished possessions, something is going on to disturb the child's emotional state. Though it is a terrifying notion for any parent to consider, this is a major sign that a child or teenager feels he or she has nothing to live for. Ask them why they suddenly feel the need to rid themselves of their belongings. If your child indicates that he "won't need these things soon," get immediate mental health care from a qualified professional.
• Suicide threats. There is a terrible misconception that people who intend to kill themselves won't talk about it; but that simply isn't true. Many people-suicidal youth included-will express their feelings of despair through either verbal or non-verbal means. They may write a suicide note, but tell you it's just a poem if they are confronted about it. They may make direct or indirect statements to the effect of having nothing to live for or a longing to die. If you hear or see any such threats of suicide (especially when combined with other signs), take them seriously; they may be indicators that the child is seriously contemplating removing themselves from this world. That's not a risk any parent should be willing to take.
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